Expectations? It’s been a weird few weeks.
This video makes me very anxious.
I’m worried for that dog’s life.
I’m worried for that horn.
I’m worried for that chair.
I’m worried for that hula hoop.
Is there an emoticon for infinite sadness?
- me: ;/
- me: thats me winking and frowning
- tori: you look great
- me: new to the emoticon game
- tori: 8=====D
- me: D>>>>>>>>>>>>> that's a sward
“In September 1988, Adriana P. Orr, a researcher at the Oxford English Dictionary, was asked to trace the etymology of the word “nachos” and conducted an initial investigation of the nacho story.”
Deal-Sealers
My friend went on a blind date last night. I sent her some “deal-sealers” to try out. These are fool proof if executed properly:
- Pretend to be choking then French kiss him.
- Bring a cup for him to pee in. Say you need it for your niece.
- Try to casually work “arugula” into the conversation as much as possible.
I haven’t heard from her today, I can only assume it’s because she died from multiple orgasms.
"Brock: After tonight, it’s time for another pizza fast. We’ve been eating a lot of pizza. Time to detox. Pizza rehab.
Rommel: I dont think we’ve been eating that much pizza.
Brock: It will be four nights in a row this evening."
Rommel: I dont think we’ve been eating that much pizza.
Brock: It will be four nights in a row this evening."
— Swimming in a river of marinara denial.
Humpday Highlights
Some things that have already happened this week:
- Drank a glass of milk. Which doesn’t sound that weird, but it was very weird.
- Found a Social Security Card and a rock while cleaning out my jewelry box.
- Listened to the Flashdance Soundtrack while painting an owl by number.
Adults + plastic toys + a bowl of hard candies + voluntarily manning a table at a zine fest for 7 hours = 2 vines & 8 photos of stacked animals.
“I sketched this picture of you while you were watching that Dove campaign video.” -The Best Boyfriend in the Universe
